Yo dont text me then not text me
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
