i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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