god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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