Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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