I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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