Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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