Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Duck Duck Cougar?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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