...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
