I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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