Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
