is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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