u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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