i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
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