Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
