he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
