You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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