kristin has been a bad kristin
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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