I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
