Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
