I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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