Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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