I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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