i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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