Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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