the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
