Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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