She said her name was "party"
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
