and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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