I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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