i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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