haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
