actually, I'm a sock model
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize