so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize