no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
3 2 1 whiskey
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
