what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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