He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
