Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
