Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Randomize
