I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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