Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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