Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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