Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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