no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
