Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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