That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize
