It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
