At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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