Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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