guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
