she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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