I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize