Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
