I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
